Spring has sprung. It has been springing for a while, actually. I have simply been too distracted to write about it. But here it is, in all its glory....









Spring means lots of hikes, brunch dates with friends, and working on new jewelry. Since the new studio has been set up (it's still a work in progress, but the essentials are there) I've been much more comfortable in the space and have been able to work on some commissions, which is always fun. I don't usually take on commissions, except for extremely close friends and family.

For my god-daughter's school auction, I created a jewelry and necklace set. I think they were split up for the auction, but they turned out beautifully. I'd been carrying those dalmation jaspers around for years, so I was happy to make something out of them and find them a new home.






I would love to get more time in the studio on a regular basis, but life takes over. Working full-time has its perks (hello, paycheck) but it means that my weekends are usually taken up by "life stuff"....you know--brunch, getting outside, doing chores. I'm slowly but systematically eradicating things in my life that create extra work at the moment. I'm not a 'minimalist' by any means, but I have no qualms about stowing away extra dishes and taking boxes of unecessary belongings to Goodwill. How do we end up with all this 'stuff,' anyway? The goal is to simplify, so that I can spend less time doing grunt work and more time doing what I love.







I was talking to someone recently, and the topic of time in relation to creative depth came up. I've been feeling lately like I just can't get too deep into thought with projects lately because I don't have the time to commit to them. It's a tricky balance--the ability to create something that has deeper meaning with only small amounts of time to really delve into those subjects.

And then, I have also been inspired in other ways, which also distract from jewelry pursuits. As silly as it may sound, I started watching a show on Netflix that grabbed my heart. It is a totally cheesy show with completely unrealistic plotlines, but it's fun and inspiring--No Tomorrow. Without giving away the entire plot/story, it makes you think about what you would do if you had say....8 months to live. And it's made me want to grab at a lot of opportunities that have a lot to do with living an incredible life.  The other show that's inspiring me is Bossgirl. I really want to read the book, but I'm halfway into the series already so I'll finish that first (I rarely watch a movie/show without reading the book first....should be interesting).

More soon....

In life, it feels like there are rare moments of true clarity. You know, those moments when you can suddenly see things, and people, for what, and who, they are.

This happened recently, during this past winter. It was as if the clouds over my mind and heart started lifting and moving away. They moved gradually, and then one day--blue skies.

It has been 12 years, today, since my father passed away. Not only did I lose one of my closest friends and confidants that day, but I lost a huge part of myself. I shut down. I let fear, originating from anxiety, take over a lot of things--my decisions about the future, my friendships, my relationships.

I am a very self-aware and self-reflective person--I always have been. It has taken years to get to this point of realization. Years of wondering what has been holding me back, and when that started. Years of tracing back memories and incidents. I mean, I was the girl who moved across the world, on her own, because she had a dream of visiting Australia. And then I stayed there for 4 years. This last year, I started wondering what in the world happened to that girl. Where did she go? Once I found the origin, all these puzzle pieces fell into place. I don't know why it took so long, but I am glad that this time has finally arrived. I am now able to see my relationships more clearly. I can let go of past faults and the guilt surrounding them. Best of all, I can stand up for myself as I move forward.

Letting go of the fear is difficult--it has been a companion for so many years now. But who wants to live in fear? I would far rather regret the things I've done and screwed up than the things I never tried. So I am moving forward, out of the forest and into the daylight.

So today, I will celebrate the life of my father as I have in years past. I will also be celebrating the courage he has given me, hearing his hearty, "You Go Girl!" resounding in my mind as I do so.

May your life offer you clarity and blue skies.
Onwards and upwards, dear friends.

Home ownership is so many things, all at once. It's blissful contentment, knowing you have something of your own--a piece of the world. A real life piece of land that you can stand on and stomp around on. It's a stressful weight, knowing that you have this huge debt, with big repercussions if something bad happens and you can't make payments (although, the same would go for renting). You can change it, modify things, make it your own, while at the same time, there is pressure to fit into society's molds, and so many broken things that need work.

I love it, though. I have always dreamed of owning my own home--ever since I was a little girl. Now, even when the rest of our lives are rough, I can sit back and say, "Babe. We own our own home," and feel proud.


Recently,  we made the unpopular decision to get rid of our guest room and move my studio in there. I say "unpopular" because there seems to be this weird societal pressure on homeowners to have a guest room. A good friend reminded me that our house is our own space to do with what we please, which helped alleviate some of my anti-guest-room guilt. I had been thinking about why I wasn't feeling motivated to be in the studio. What I realized with the garage studio is that it wasn't my own space. Not only was it cold, but I was sharing that space with gym equipment, lawn mowers, and various tools. The energy was all wrong.

So, we moved the bed and boxes and bikes out of the guest room, painted the purple walls white, and since then my bench and work table have taken up residence. We still have yet to move the hydraulic press and rolling mill in, and the soldering station will remain in the garage (this will mean that I have to get a cute little tray to carry items to and from the garage...not too upset about that).


One of the things I love about this move is that I'm getting the chance to reorganize and go through my drawers and discard things. As an artist, I tend to accumulate things that I "might use." Granted, I usually do end up using things, or feeling guilty if I get rid of them and need them later. But then there are items like collected bugs (yes, I used to collect bugs), or old molds for concrete and resin that I most likely will never use. It is refreshing, and renewing. Now, I can't wait to work in the studio. I got all my tools set up the other day and once I am home again (I've been dog/house sitting for 10 days across town) I can get to work on projects. I can even put up shelves! And artwork! I can display my jewelry--the big, eccentric stuff that is purely conceptual and I love to bits!

This, my friends, is part of the dream.

At some point, I started being swayed not by peoples' judgment of me, but by their possible judgment. It was a fear based in anxiety, which has been a part of my life as long as I can remember. This fear has affected not only my everyday life, but my creative work as well. I have always been inspired by the natural world--finding wonder in flora, fauna, and stones. Of course, others are inspired by the same things, but as long as we are true to ourselves, the execution of those ideas will always be as individual as we are.

Perhaps it is from attending art school--there is a sense that your ideas must go beyond the base layer. There must be so much substance that making production work can often feel futile or lacking somehow. My education in Australia was vastly different. Sure, we needed to have a concept, but the drive was different. Exploring forms and ideas for their visual appeal alone was not frowned upon. I could easily make a series of rings about endangered butterflies (with proper research, of course) and it would be commended--in fact, I created just that for my final project. The pressure from my U.S. institution was far different, although it has made me a better artist both conceptually and technically. There was more demand, more pressure to be conceptually driven. Occasionally a student would come along who wanted to make "pretty things," and you could almost see the professors cringe.

Realistically, those professors are right. There should be thought and concept in what we make, if it is anything other than production work. Even for production work, creating a story is essential--a lesson that has been cemented by working in retail.

Now, I look back to artists such as Julie Blyfield and think, "Why am I holding back? Why have I let this fall by the wayside?" In this day and age, it is so easy to get caught up in what other people think. We are constantly bombarded (mostly, through our own choosing) with images, and as an artist who follows other artists on social media, those images are of other peoples jewelry. It can be overwhelming, confusing, inspiring, and humbling.

So, I am evolving. This evolution has been anything but a straight line--it is more akin to how we evolve as people, with twists, turns, loops, and squiggles. As my new studio space takes shape, my heart feels more focused. I cannot wait to share with you what is next.

In my family--my immediate family in particular--names are inherited. They represent our history, and we each know the origins of our respective names. For example, my first name Catherine is from my paternal great-great-great grandmother, Catherine Cumerford. Her father was an Irish Catholic who fled to England, then Australia (where Catherine was born), and finally to California. My middle name, Elisabeth, is from my maternal grandmother. Some of my siblings have middle names that reflect historical last names in the family, like 'Tomlinson', and so on and so forth.

Over the years, I have learned that there are many women with the name 'Catherine Chandler' in the world, and that many of us seem to be creative--poets, writers, painters, etc. I also know that the main character in the 1980's show Beauty & The Beast was a female lawyer named Catherine Chandler. This was all very cute and trivial until recent years when said TV show was re-made and ran for four seasons. The internet being what it is, this new version of the show has collected a great fan base and now, whenever you search my name, guess what comes up? A vast collection of websites, pinterest pages, etc., devoted to a fictional TV character.

Now, if I was just your average girl, this would pose no issue. But, I'm not. I am an artist who has spent over a decade building a name and an audience. Granted, I have been less 'vocal' over the past couple years in this space due to finishing a degree and life choices.

This whole conundrum has had me wondering if I need to change my artistic/business name. The idea of starting over basically from scratch just rubs me the wrong way. After much thought, I think the best course of action is to simply be more present--in my posts here, as well as in my etsy shop and website, which are in dire need of some updates.

The timing of this is actually good, as I've felt a re-awakening of my creative spirit lately. Perhaps it's finally feeling settled into our new home after a year of living here. There's been a shift, and I can't wait to show you what's next. There will be new work, a new studio (again, I know), and an evolution of motifs and inspiration.

Thank you for reading.

Winter in the Pacific Northwest is a quiet affair. The rain and cold locks us in much of the time, and this winter has been no exception. In fact, it has gone above and beyond with snow days, ice storms, and freezing rain.

Much of November and December were spent getting jewelry ready to sell, and then the rush of the holiday season came and went. My husband was laid off from his job right before Thanksgiving, and between that, the election, and the stress of Sammy's flirtation with death, there was not a huge amount of joy this holiday season. But we made it what we could, and found joy in the little things.



This year, I expect there to be a lot of sticking close to home and improving our lives locally until DW gets a job and we can breathe a little easier. Luckily, we have gone through tough times before. Granted, we didn't have quite so many bills during those times, but we know how to make do. It is not an impossible task.

I have been getting bits and pieces of time in the studio. It is not well-insulated, so is the same temperature of the outside much of the time, which in these temperatures makes it less desirable to work in. I do have a little space heater which helps a bit. We have been talking about simply converting the garage into an actual room and doing away with the garage door all together--walling it in with a window or french doors. It would be better insulated and more inviting that way.

But, that is far into the future. This year, we will be keeping our budget tight and focusing on the garden beds by the side of the house. Ziggy has been keeping us busy with hikes and meet-ups with other GSPs. We are so lucky to live close to the largest off-leash dog park in the area, and there is a huge group of people with dogs just like Zig Zag. I can't wait until we can get back to hiking and going on bigger adventures! I actually just had my shoulder looked at by a chiropractor because there have been some issues with it locking up, and will have to do some serious modifications to my exercise regime. I see many, many more hikes, walks, and runs in the future--basically anything that doesn't aggravate my shoulder.

While this winter has brought about many feelings of doubt, misfortune, anxiety, etc., I am looking forward to spring and counting our many blessings. I have a wonderful boss and work at a great job amongst beautiful jewelry all day. I come home to a loving, supportive husband and three crazy loving animals.  We own our sweet home. These are just a few of the things I am grateful for on a daily basis. It is so easy to lose sight of those things and let the bad feelings get the best of you.

And now, for some hot cocoa and studio time...

The other day, I spent almost 8 hours in the studio. With some breaks in between, of course. I have been struggling with my creativity for months now. Part of it, I attribute to buying a house and moving in, renovating the space for my studio, and all of that transition. It takes a little while to feel comfortable and connected in a new space. But more than that, I feel as if I have been breaking through a lot of barriers lately. As if there has been a cloud surrounding both myself and my husband--since we moved, we have reconnected with family and friends who we had not seen in a long while. I have probably mentioned it before, but there was just something about that last apartment that clouded and depressed us, even as cute and centrally located as it was.

We are thriving out here on the outskirts of Portland. I am still dreaming of moving further and further out, too. If only those smaller towns had decent job opportunities!

I am going back into the studio today. And tomorrow. There are earrings and necklaces and rings and bracelets to be made. I need to order some metal, but at least I can get a start on things and figure out what else I need. It feels so refreshing to have a clearer mind and feel connected with my work.

_________________________

One a different note, today is of great importance. I rarely get political here, but this warrants it. We have just witnessed a historic election. I am NOT talking about Trump being elected--there is nothing historic about a misogynistic, racist, bigot white male winning the presidency. What is historic is that Hillary Clinton was our nominee and came just inches away from being the first female president. She may not have broken the highest glass ceiling, but there sure as hell are a lot more cracks in it.

I have been dismayed, shocked, and appalled at the events in this election--from the way the debates were conducted, to the vitriol encouraged by and spewed by Trump, and finally to the American electoral college (I will not say the American People because the popular vote produced a very different result) electing a bully to our nation's highest office.

However...I am a hopeful realist at heart, and while I may be eating my words in a few months, I don't believe this is the end of the world. It is an opportunity for us to look at what is wrong with our nation--where there are cracks, injuries, etc.--and to fix it. It is an opportunity for us to do better, to do more. To get out there and volunteer. Put our boots on the ground rather than our fingers on screens.

We must start at home. First, by being the change we want to see in the world. Second, by working with others, practicing what we preach, and teaching the next generation. We must stop turning a blind eye to hate, to negativity, to bigotry and sexism and racism. It starts with us--each and every one of us. And after that, Vote for your city councilors. Vote for your mayors, governors, representatives, and senators. It starts at the roots.


Nasty Woman pendant made by Fig Jewelry. You can special order these at Silverado Portland Jewelry, or through her website! I will continue wearing mine with pride.